I Want Oreos
Thursday morning...the 5th day that I had been waking up so early than normal. It's mainly because of the physical discomfort I feel specially on my lower back because of the baby's weight. (Actually, I feel a little bit guilty everytime I wake up so early because my husband wakes and gets up too when he senses that I am not beside him.)
As expected, he was awake too and was spending time browsing online. He noticed that I went to the pantry, got and opened the box of Oreo cookies. I had been eating Oreos for 3 mornings straight then. I was not a fan of that cookie before. In fact, it's been in the pantry for few months, unopened. But lately, I just found myself gorging 5 or more pieces.
He approached and told me that I should not eat Oreos. "It's not healthy," if I remember it right on how he said it. He asked if I wanted anything for breakfast, and my answer was "NO." I just wanted to eat Oreos. I was not that hungry, but I wanted to munch the cookies. I was upset and threw myself on the couch, my back against his face. So he decided to turn around so he could see me face to face. He knew that I was pretty upset, but wanted to know more details. I covered my face with a pillow and started to cry. The negative thought just filled my mind. I felt that I am not taking care enough of our baby because I was not eating healthy food. I got that idea when he said that "it's not healthy." Later he was able to convince me to talk, and I told him about what I felt and thought of myself.
My husband calmed me down and assured me that eating Oreos does not make me a bad mother. He just wanted to make a good breakfast for me, and that is one of his ways to show that he cares about me. Besides, he wanted us to share breakfast together. It's been a little while since we ate breakfast together, and he missed it. Our meal schedule had been chaotic lately due to the changes being affected by my pregnancy where most of the time than usual, we see ourselves eating separately and eating different food.
It was a tearful morning for both of us. But at the end of it, we found ourselves understanding each other's feelings and concerns, and loving each other more.
With regards to the Oreo "habit," I think it became a "comfort food" for me. It's kind of like a psychological reward from the frustration I felt everytime my body complained that I had to wake up and jump out from bed too early.
Been 2 mornings now since that incident that I did not grab the box of Oreo. And yes, I still wake up so early.
As expected, he was awake too and was spending time browsing online. He noticed that I went to the pantry, got and opened the box of Oreo cookies. I had been eating Oreos for 3 mornings straight then. I was not a fan of that cookie before. In fact, it's been in the pantry for few months, unopened. But lately, I just found myself gorging 5 or more pieces.
He approached and told me that I should not eat Oreos. "It's not healthy," if I remember it right on how he said it. He asked if I wanted anything for breakfast, and my answer was "NO." I just wanted to eat Oreos. I was not that hungry, but I wanted to munch the cookies. I was upset and threw myself on the couch, my back against his face. So he decided to turn around so he could see me face to face. He knew that I was pretty upset, but wanted to know more details. I covered my face with a pillow and started to cry. The negative thought just filled my mind. I felt that I am not taking care enough of our baby because I was not eating healthy food. I got that idea when he said that "it's not healthy." Later he was able to convince me to talk, and I told him about what I felt and thought of myself.
My husband calmed me down and assured me that eating Oreos does not make me a bad mother. He just wanted to make a good breakfast for me, and that is one of his ways to show that he cares about me. Besides, he wanted us to share breakfast together. It's been a little while since we ate breakfast together, and he missed it. Our meal schedule had been chaotic lately due to the changes being affected by my pregnancy where most of the time than usual, we see ourselves eating separately and eating different food.
It was a tearful morning for both of us. But at the end of it, we found ourselves understanding each other's feelings and concerns, and loving each other more.
With regards to the Oreo "habit," I think it became a "comfort food" for me. It's kind of like a psychological reward from the frustration I felt everytime my body complained that I had to wake up and jump out from bed too early.
Been 2 mornings now since that incident that I did not grab the box of Oreo. And yes, I still wake up so early.
